The Most Costly Decision-Making Mistake You’re Probably Making

Most people make decisions the way they learned to ride a bike—by just doing it, falling a few times, and hoping they’ll get better. But decision-making is a fundamental life skill.

And while it seems like something you should already know how to do, the truth is, most of us have never been taught how to make decisions effectively.

Let’s begin with a quote from Einstein: “In the middle of difficulty lies opportunity.”

That’s a clue. Because the best decisions don’t come from avoiding problems—they come from learning how to work with them. But here’s the issue.

Most of us learned to make decisions through unstructured trial and error. And that kind of learning, though necessary, can be slow, painful, and inefficient.

Sure, some decisions are obvious.

If it’s freezing outside, you wear a jacket. No deliberation required. But the decisions we’re talking about—the ones that shape your career, your relationships, your wellbeing—those take time.

If a decision takes more than five minutes and causes mental friction, it deserves a better process. And once you build this muscle, your confidence grows. People start coming to you, asking for your advice.

So, where do most people go wrong?

They skip the first step. They never define the actual decision problem. They jump into research, start collecting data, comparing options, weighing pros and cons—but they never pause to ask: what exactly am I trying to solve?

It’s like climbing a ladder only to realize it’s leaning against the wrong wall.

If you haven’t clearly defined the decision problem, you can't make a wise decision. The most common mistake inexperienced decision-makers make is jumping straight into problem-solving without first defining the problem.

And yet, every decision problem is a hidden opportunity. If you treat decisions like threats, you’ll wait for life to corner you. But if you view them as opportunities, you can act before the crisis.

• Anticipate job insecurity? Start exploring your options now.
• Know your health could become a concern? Start deciding what habits to build now. The more proactive you become, the more power you regain.

Let’s walk through a six-step formula that helps you define your decision problem clearly.

This is how decision-making can be improved—not by adding more information, but by structuring your clarity from the start.

Step one. Write down your initial take. Don’t overthink. Just describe the problem in plain words. What’s bothering you? What’s pulling your attention?

Step two. Identify the trigger. What caused you to think about this in the first place? Was it something your boss said? A gut feeling that your role is stagnating? A subtle shift in your financial situation? The trigger holds clues. It can break the fog and help you spot deeper opportunities.

Step three. List the essential elements. Let’s say you’re thinking about changing jobs. What matters most? Exposure to new skills? A salary bump? Remote work? Willingness to relocate? Your ability to answer these questions will help clarify what you’re trying to resolve.

Step four. Refine your problem statement. Restate it. Then ask yourself: Is this the real issue? Could there be a deeper question underneath? The act of redefining almost always reveals better solutions. Ask yourself: Am I working on the right problem?

Yes, it might feel like overkill. But a poorly defined decision is a trap. You can spend days or weeks gathering data and still end up solving the wrong issue. That’s not progress. That’s expensive confusion.

Step five. Seek insight from people you trust. Friends, mentors, partners—people who know you well can offer different angles. How would your dad view the situation? Your colleague? Your coach? The creativity here isn’t just in the answers—it’s in learning to see the same decision through someone else’s eyes.

Because defining the problem is itself a decision. And a powerful one. Every layer of clarity you add here changes the outcome you’ll eventually reach.

Step six. Don’t fall for the easy excuses. Your mind will say, “I don’t have time.” Or, “This isn’t worth overthinking.” Or, “Let’s just move forward.”

A study shows that individuals who invest time in defining their decision problems tend to make better decisions in the long run.

If you skip this part, you may think you’re moving fast—until later, when you realize you went down the wrong path. Time, energy, and even money get wasted trying to correct a decision that was unclear from the beginning.

Let’s bring it to life with an example.

Say you’re thinking about buying a new car. Instead of rushing to pick a model, use this approach to ask better questions:

• What are your top 3–5 options?
• Should you lease or buy? Why or why not? What matters more—status, maintenance, or resale value?
• How will your income change in the next 12 months?
• What do consumer reports say? Keep going. Let your curiosity lead.

Questions like these help you define the problem with precision. And better definitions always lead to better decisions.

To recap: the first—and most often skipped—step in improving your decision-making is to clearly define your decision problem.

We explored six steps to do just that.

1. Step one: Write down your initial assessment.
2. Step two: Analyze what triggered the decision.
3. Step three: Identify essential elements.
4. Step four: Refine your problem statement.
5. Step five: Seek trusted insight.
6. Step six: Ignore the excuses and do the work.

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If this was helpful, I’d love for you to explore more through the newsletter, upcoming trainings, or my Heroic Manifestation courses. You’ll learn how to bring intention, clarity, and quiet power to every important decision in your life.

Let’s create a Heroic Lifestyle,

Sarit Tagore
Creator of Heroic Manifestation™
Connect with me: Website | YouTube | LinkedIn
P.S. If this landed, share it with someone who might need it today. One minute of clarity can shift an entire day.